I Am the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from Kindergarten Cop: A Candid Conversation.

The action icon is best known as an Hollywood heavyweight. But, at the height of his blockbuster fame in the eighties and nineties, he also headlined several genuinely hilarious comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which celebrates its 35-year mark this holiday season.

The Role and The Famous Scene

In the classic film, Schwarzenegger portrays a hardened detective who goes undercover as a elementary educator to catch a killer. For much of the film's runtime, the crime storyline acts as a simple backdrop for Schwarzenegger to film humorous scenes with children. Arguably the most famous belongs to a little boy named Joseph, who out of nowhere rises and declares the stoic star, “Males have a penis, girls have a vagina.” Arnold deadpans, “Thanks for the tip.”

The young actor was brought to life by child star Miko Hughes. Beyond this role encompassed a character arc on Full House as the bully to the child stars and the haunting part of the child who returns in the 1989 adaptation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He still works in film today, with several projects in development. Additionally, he engages with fans at the con circuit. Recently shared his memories from the production over three decades on.

A Young Actor's Perspective

Question: Starting off, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: My understanding is I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.

That's impressive, I can't remember being four. Do you have any memories from that time?

Yeah, a little bit. They're snapshots. They're like picture memories.

Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?

My mother, mainly would accompany me to auditions. Often it was like a cattle call. There'd be 20, 30 kids and we'd all just have to wait, be seen, be in there less than five minutes, do whatever little line they wanted and then leave. My parents would help me learn the words and then, once I learned to read, that was the initial content I was reading.

Do you have a specific memory of meeting Arnold? What was your feeling about him?

He was very kind. He was fun. He was good-natured, which I suppose isn't too surprising. It would have been odd if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom, that likely wouldn't create a positive atmosphere. He was great to work with.

“It'd be weird if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom.”

I understood he was a major movie star because my family informed me, but I had not actually watched his movies. I sensed the excitement — it was exciting — but he didn't really intimidate me. He was just fun and I was eager to interact with him when he was available. He was occupied, of course, but he'd sometimes engage here and there, and we would hang off of his arms. He'd show his strength and we'd be holding on. He was exceptionally kind. He bought every kid in the classroom a Sony Walkman, which at the time was like an iPhone. That was the coolest device, that iconic bright yellow cassette player. I used to rock out to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for ages on that thing. It wore out in time. I also received a authentic coach's whistle. He had the teacher's whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.

Do you remember your experience as being fun?

You know, it's amusing, that movie was this cultural thing. It was such a big movie, and it was such an amazing experience, and you would think, looking back now, I would want my memories to be of the star himself, the direction of Ivan Reitman, traveling to Oregon, seeing the set, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. For example, they got everyone pizza, but I avoided pizza. All I would eat was the toppings only. Then, the first-generation Game Boy was new. That was the big craze, and I was proficient. I was the youngest and some of the older kids would bring me their Game Boys to beat difficult stages on games because I knew how, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all childhood recollections.

The Infamous Moment

OK, that specific dialogue, do you remember how it happened? Did you understand the words?

At the time, I probably didn't know what the word provocative meant, but I realized it got a reaction and it got a big laugh. I was aware it was kind of something I shouldn't normally say, but I was given approval in this case because it was comedic.

“It was a difficult decision for her.”

How it was conceived, according to family lore, was they hadn't finalized all the dialogue. Some character lines were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the entire ensemble assembled, it was more of a collaboration, but they refined it on set and, I suppose it's either the director or producers came to my mom and said, "There's a concept. We want Miko to deliver this dialogue. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't agree right away. She said, "Let me think about it, let me sleep on it" and took a day or two. It was a tough call for her. She said she was hesitant, but she thought it could end up as one of the iconic quotes from the movie and her instinct was correct.